Last week in my 20's

I turned thirty years old yesterday. The first words that came to mind when Sara (my roommate/friend/missionary sister) asked me how I felt was that I have ad a good life. We both started laughing because for a moment it sounded as if I was 95 years old and had had a plethora of life experience I was looking back at and reflecting on. But that is honestly how I truly feel. I have had a good life. Sure, I’ve seen my fair share of suffering and had some suffering of my own – but in the midst of all that, the one thing I can attest to with 100% conviction is that the goodness God has blessed me with far outweighs any measure of difficulty. Even in the midst of sorrow, He has brought forth beauty and goodness, showing me over and over again how He has conquered the world (John 16:33) and that my life is in the Almighty hands of Infinite Goodness, Perfect Love.

This past week we had the CSU (Catholic Student Union) from FSU come and serve/journey with us. To be honest I was very tired on our way to pick them up at the airport in Port-au-Prince since we’ve had groups come back to back since January aside from other ministry events. My focus was more geared on being able to get through the week as opposed to looking forward to journeying with people that God was leading here. But thankfully, by His grace, despite my being tired, the Lord quickly reminded me that His power is made perfect in weakness. On our 3-4 hours truck ride to the base I was able to get over my being tired and my eyes were quickly opened to the beauty of the young men and women He gifted me with this week. Right off the bat, I started having deep and substantial conversations with different members from the group.

The depth and beauty of the human soul is pretty astounding once you take the time to actually listen and ponder the magnificent ways the Lord writes each story with such delicacy, attention to detail, sense of adventure, twists and turns - a perfect picture reflecting His redeeming and transformative love. It’s amazing. Words don’t do it justice.

I felt as if in big ways and little ways God used this last week in my 20’s as a reminder of all he has done in my life. It was a week jam packed with prayer, communal life, sharing the Gospel, sharing my life story and getting to hear others’ stories, taking care of people who were sick/injured, dancing, singing, traveling, playing with little kids, great coffee, flowers, and the Lord even brought a fellow Texan here for me to be able to relate to :)    

I am one thankful girl. I am excited for what the next thirty years have in store. I am excited for what is to come. I am excited to jump back into nursing full time and one day go back to school. I am excited to see friends and family. I am excited for entering into my vocation - I have no clue of when that will happen but I feel that is something the Lord is working on.

I know leaving Haiti will be very difficult. As the time draws near for me to return to the United States, my heart is keenly aware of the pain it will go through from leaving people that I love, people that have a piece of my heart. But I was once told, or I read it somewhere, that if you really love a person, pain is inevitable, and that means you loved well. I sure hope so. 

Akrin, little girl at Fr. Deu's monastery/orphanage. LOVE her.